End of the line
by Missbooie
Summary: Two new F2s join the team at Holby ED causing friction between Cal and Ethan
1. Chapter 1

End of the line

Ethan walked through the main entrance towards Cal who was stood at reception, seemingly engrossed in his notes that he was starting intently at.  
>'Hello?!' Ethan waved his hand in front of his brother's face to try and get his attention- he succeeded and Cal looked up from his notes.<br>'What?'  
>'Just wanted to remind you that the two new F2s are starting today and I'm mentoring one and you're mentoring the other.'<br>'Yeah, yeah sure.' Cal dismissed the comment with a flick of his wrist before going back to studying the X-Ray in front of him.  
>Ethan looked at the X-Ray before walking towards the staffroom. He stopped suddenly and turned to face Caleb<br>'Caleb,'  
>'Yeah'<br>'Hairline fracture to the Ulna- you're welcome'  
>Ethan turned sharply on his heel and continued on his was towards the staffroom, smiling to himself. His joyful mood was commented on by Dylan and Zoe but he took no note of their sarcastic comments. His happiness couldn't be explained- Ethan just had a good feeling about today.<br>Once changed into scrubs and working in cubicles Ethan saw Cal again- his stormy face was the antithesis of Ethan's sunny smile.  
>'Connie's office- now'<br>Ethan rolled his eyes at the older doctor- sometimes he just had no idea what was going on inside his brothers head.  
>With a spring in his step and a smile on his face he made his way to Connie's office- Cal was already waiting outside.<p>

The two brothers walked in to be greeted by two young F2s and Connie. Connie was wearing her usual icy glare but the F2s were warm but obviously nervous.  
>'Cal and Ethan this is Dr Rosie March and Dr George Jackson, Rosie and George this is Dr Caleb Knight and Dr Ethan Hardy.'<br>The four doctors exchanged pleasantries. Cal's mood had significantly brightened up since he had seen the young F2- Rosie was tall with lightly tanned skin, long wavy brown hair and thick purple glasses that covered her dark chocolatey eyes. She was in complete contrast to George who was pale with cropped ginger hair and piecing blue eyes.  
>'Cal you will be mentoring George and Ethan you'll be mentoring Rosie'<br>Connie knew this was the right decision- if Cal and Rosie were partnered together Cal may be 'distracted' by her. Both of the young doctors were capable but she didn't want to take any risks.

'Hi Rosie I'm Dr Hardy but you can call me Ethan. I'll take you to the staff room so you can get changed into your scrubs and find your locker.'  
>The first two doctors made their way to the staff room talking contently, the other two doctors followed in silence.<p>

The brothers stood in the staff room as the new F2s found their lockers and scrubs. George left to get changed into his scrubs but Rosie just got changed in front of them. As she got changed Cal continued to stare at her- her olive-tinted skin was flawless and a small tattoo was revealed as she pulled on her top.  
>'What's your tattoo?' Cal seemed genuinely interested but Ethan was taken aback- he had sat down to read while Rosie was changing.<br>'This? Oh it says 'hope' something I never want to lose'  
>A smile broke out on Cal's face and he was about to reply when George returned to the staffroom dressed in scrubs.<p>

Cal sighed and left the staffroom with George and headed to cubicles.  
>Rosie had finished getting dressed so Ethan put down the textbook he was reading, stood up and stretched.<br>'So where are we going?' Rosie's optimistic manner reminded Ethan of Cal's young christmas attitude and he smiled to himself internally.  
>'We are in resus for the first half of our shift and then we'll swap with Cal and George into cubicles.'<p>

For a F2 Rosie was surprisingly good. Ethan was impressed and by the end of her first shift he allowed her to work alone in the cubicle next to him- making sure that she asked him for help if she needed it. For George however, it was a completely different story- he needed prompting to do the simplest of tasks and after hours of working together Cal was fed up of George and didn't try and hide it.

The two brothers walked out of the ED and, once out of earshot of any other staff members, Cal couldn't hold back any longer.  
>'God I can't stand him!'<br>'What?'  
>'He's just so annoying and incompetent!'<br>'Who? George?'  
>'Yes George- I can't believe that he is supposed to be a F2!'<br>'Cut him some slack- it's only his first shift and his first day in a new hospital.'  
>'Yeah but...just...Ulgh!'<br>Ethan laughed as he opened the door to his apartment that Cal was still living in.


	2. Chapter 2

A new day brought new surprises, George was even more incompetent than first thought and Cal was getting more frustrated with the young F2, however Rosie and Ethan were getting on a storm- they were alike in so many ways but had no loving feelings for each other, they were affectionate but more like brother and sister than girlfriend and boyfriend. Cal wasted no time in noticing their relationship- he was jealous and wanted Rosie for himself. Cal's mood darkened when George wrongly diagnosed a broken arm- mistaking a smudge on the x-ray for a large fracture, and it was not helped when Rosie and Ethan were called away to attend a major RTC.

'Right Rosie- we're going to an RTC so suit up and meet me outside in five minutes.'

Rosie was there in three. Ethan pulled up the MERIT car and smiled-she was amazing, competent, punctual and had amazing people skills. She had spent part of the shift with the paediatric specialist- something that was normally out of the question for a F2- and had got on great. She was calm and sensitive, making the children feel at ease and the parents confident that they had come to the right place.

While on the way to the RTC Ethan talked Rosie through what would happen but she wasn't paying any attention.

'So are you ready?'

Rosie made no response so Ethan leant over and gently rubbed her shoulder, causing Rosie to jump with shock.

'Hmmm?! What?! I'm so sorry Dr Hardy- I just wasn't with it. It won't happen again- I promise.'

Ethan laughed

'Its okay- really. You're an amazing doctor and I'm sure you'll do great!'

Ethan looked at her again and said with mock seriousness

'And I told you to call me Ethan.'

'Right- yes Dr Hardy- I mean Ethan!'

The two doctors shared a smile as the climbed out of the car.

'Hi Dixie- this is Rosie my F2 mentee.'

Dixie and Rosie exchanged pleasantries

'What have we got Dixie?'

'Right- RTC lorry verses motorbike. The driver of the motorbike has been trapped under the car for at least 30 minutes- injuries unknown. We have the HART team currently trying to free him. The driver says that he looked around 20, the driver has no visible injuries but he has been sent to Holby already because he seemed rather shocked and we just wanted to keep him under observation.'

Rosie, Ethan and Dixie walked towards the over-turned lorry where the HART team were working. A trail of blood was seeping out from under the lorry. Rosie paled and walked silently towards the lorry, constantly giving nervous glances to her mentor standing next to her. Ethan didn't notice- there was something else that his attention was focused on- on the other side of the lorry there was something sticking out from under the lorry.

'Rosie- with me now'

Ethan ran over to the lorry and, despite his experience he was still shocked when he saw what originally caught his eye- a small, slender hand was poking out from under the lorry.

'DIXIE! There's another one!'

Rosie felt sick. The hand clearly belonged to a young woman. For once she didn't feel like taking control. She didn't need to say anything- with one look at his F2 Ethan knew that she wasn't comfortable. Ethan tried to get a pulse but failed. The back up HART team arrived and made their way over to the first team to make a plan. The lorry had soft sides which here sliced open- a rough form of two bodies was formed under heavy boxes- currently the hand was their priority. They managed to get to the person- it was nothing more than a body. It was a mess of blood and bones- the hand that they saw poking out from under the lorry had been severed at the elbow. There were scraps of what looked like a floaty top and jeans everywhere. Despite all her injuries she was still identifiable- her face was slightly cut and her long brown hair was knotted and sticky from her blood. There were bones sticking out of her neck and chest, there didn't seem to be part of her that wasn't broken or bloody.

Ethan and Rosie walked over to where the other person was thought to be- it was a young lad who was also wearing jeans and a jacket. He seemed in better shape- despite being in conscious with open fractures he seemed to be stable. Ethan was confident that he was stable enough to be taken to the ED. Ethan glanced towards the young doctor as he helped load the unknown male onto the ambulance- she was stood still, not making a sound, starring vacantly at the floor. Her normally smiling lips were held in a sharp line, gently quaking, her laughing eyes were somber and she seemed on the edge of tears. Ethan had never seen her like this and for the first time since the arrived at Holby she seemed young and vulnerable.

'Dix- I'm going to go now- I'll see you in a couple minutes.'

'Okay'

Ethan made his way over to where Rosie was standing and stood next to her. She said nothing- she didn't even acknowledge his presence. The HART, Police and Fire teams were working behind them to try and clear the mess but the silence between the doctors was deafening. Ethan said nothing but pulled Rosie into a tight embrace, once in the strong hold of her mentor she stopped trying to hide her emotions- she let the tears freely fall from her eyes and run down her face, accumulating in a damp puddle on Ethan's shoulder. The hug broke apart but Ethan took Rosie's hand to lead her away from the crash and back to the ED. The journey back was eerily quiet neither doctor said a word but Ethan frequently gave nervous glances to Rosie. They arrived at the ED five minutes after Dixie and Ian had.

'You can go back to the staffroom and get changed into your own clothes- not scrubs- and make yourself a hot cuppa'

He received nothing a sad smile in return. He walked in the opposite direction- towards Connie's office. He knocked on the door before walking in.

'Mrs Beauchump I would like to request that Dr March finishes her shift now.'

Connie cynically glanced up at the young doctor.

'We have just attended a fatal RTC which seems to have deeply affected her and I don't think she should be working in her current state. Plus we are due to finish within an hour.'

Ethan braced himself for the answer, but to his surprise she answered,

'Sure- you can both go, just don't make a big deal about it. Make sure you look after her tomorrow as well- offering her extra support of she needs or wants it. I'll see you both tomorrow.'

Ethan walked out of the office relieved that he had some time off. He arrived at the staffroom and got changed into his own clothes. Beginning to think that Rosie had left without him, Ethan walked towards the exit. Rosie was stood frozen, outside.

'Come on- I'll take you home.'

Yet again Rosie found herself being guided towards a car by Ethan. She got in buckled up and told Ethan where he could drop her off.

The drive was silent until Ethan said,

'You can talk about it you know. It's perfectly alright to feel upset and sometimes even angry but the worst thing you can do is to bottle it up.'

Fresh tears spilt down her face

'How can you see that? How can it not upset you?'

Ethan smiled sadly

'It doesn't get easier, it doesn't seem any less horrific and it certainly doesn't never affect you. It's just you find ways of coping, of blocking it out while you work and then spill the emotion to someone you're close too. I talk to Caleb when I've had a rough day- you also need to talk to someone.'

Rosie wiped her tears with her sleeve,

'Thanks Ethan.'

They pulled up to an apartment style building.

'This is where I live- I share a nurses flat with George. They had a few spare flats that the nurses weren't using and they allowed doctors to take them.'

Rosie got out of the car after thanking Ethan yet again and puling him into another hug.


	3. Chapter 3

Rosie felt reluctant to talk about her day. George came home around an hour after she did and instead of talking she busied herself by making dinner- vegetarian spaghetti bolognese. Rosie wasn't vegetarian but her flatmate was so she had learnt to adapt her cooking style to cater for him.

'So how was your day?' Rosie attempted to start a conversation with the other F2

'Rubbish- I can't do anything, I'm annoying my mentor and half the nurses and... and... I never wanted to be a doctor in the first place!'

Rosie was shocked- he had always seemed so adamant that he had to be a doctor. Then it all clicked into place- his parents wanted him to be a doctor so that's what he did, but he didn't want to be a doctor himself. Rosie turned back to making dinner- right now George needed her help more than she needed his, or so she thought.

The night following the crash was sleepless- filled with never ending nightmares and faces that haunted her. She had never been to an RTC before and, now, hopefully never again. She just had to spill it out to someone, anyone. Rosie rolled over to look at the clock on her bedside table- 2:30 am. Without any conscious thought Rosie pulled on a pair of socks and her jumper, she then walked out her room and grabbed her shoes and coat. Having found herself at the front door she suddenly knew where she was going. When Ethan hugged her last night she had felt him slip something into her coat pocket, and, sure enough, there was a note:

Rosie- talk to me anytime about anything.

Then there was a mobile phone number and an address.

Despite all the other emotions spinning in her head she smiled at the small act of kindness. She scribbled a note for George and left it on the kitchen table.

10 minutes later she arrived at Ethan's flat, cold, tired and upset. She rang the doorbell twice in quick succession and then stood watching her breath in the cold night air.

A groggy Ethan opened the door, he had clearly just got out of bed- his glasses were crooked, his hair a tousled mess and his pyjamas crumpled. Rosie grabbed him and hugged him, tears once again falling down her face. Ethan seemed to have suddenly woken up as he muttered gently to her that everything is going to be alright. They stood, held in an embrace for what felt like forever, it was Ethan that broke it apart- after all they were still stood on a doorstep in the winter at 3am. Ethan took Rosie inside and sat her down on the sofa, he then made two hot chocolates with whipped cream and mini marshmallows. He gave one to Rosie and then sat down next to her, thy sat in silence, quietly sipping their hot drinks, allowing the warm sweetness to flood their bodies.

'Rosie- why are you here?'

Ethan didn't need to ask- he already knew but he just wanted to hear it from the F2 herself

'I can't sleep- every time I close my eyes I see it, her face haunts me, whenever it's quiet I hear screams- I don't even know why- they were both unconscious when we arrived. I... I... I just can't do it! I'm useless- that woman died and I did nothing.'

The tears were streaming down her face hot and angry.

'She died and I couldn't do anything.'

The tears still streamed down her face but these were tears of sorrow and hurt.

Ethan held her close to his chest and let her cry.

'We did everything we could- she was already dead but the other person on the motorbike is recovering and the driver was fine. You're an amazing doctor- much better than any F2 I have ever seen. You were even better than me!'

Rosie smiled at the last comment- finally feeling at rest, a wave of calmness washed over her body and flooded her in tiredness. She knew that she should leave and go home to bed but here, in Ethan's arms it was safe and warm, she could feel his steady heart beat and the hear the steady rhythm of his breathing.

Ethan watched as the young doctor drifted off into a peaceful sleep next to him. He leant over to the other side of the bed and picked up a cushion and a blanket. He slipped out from where Rosie had fallen asleep on him and gently placed her head on the cushion. He swung her legs up onto the sofa before covering her in a thick, fluffy blanket. Ethan scribbled a note saying he was upstairs- first room on the left and then took the dirty mugs back to the kitchen and taking himself back to bed- it was now 4:30am- he needed to be back at work in a couple of hours and couldn't afford to be late.


	4. Chapter 4

The alarm blared- it was 6:30 and time to get up. Ethan rolled over and turned off the alarm, ready to go back to sleep- then he remembered the sleeping girl downstairs. Despite his best efforts Cal had got there first and was stood in the doorway watching Rosie sleep. Cal turned and faced Ethan with a questioning look.

'Did you-'

Cal was cut off by Ethan

'No! Yesterday we attended a fatal RTC lorry versus motorbike, she was in such a state that I asked Connie to let her go home, we had less than an hour less anyway, and she let us both leave. I took her home and gave her a note saying that she could talk to me anytime and I left our address and my mobile number. She was at the doorstep around 3 this morning. She was a mess and completely wrecked by the accident. After she calmed down she fell asleep I top of me and I wasn't going to kick her out- it's freezing!'

Cal raised an eyebrow at his brother- since when was he desirable as a councillor? Cal was about to make a comment but was interrupted by Rosie who woke up with a start. Ethan rushed to her side

'Rosie- it's okay you're at my flat. Remember you came here early this morning?'

Rosie looked embarrassed

'Yeah- sorry about that...'

'It doesn't matter- he's a night owl anyway this one'

Rosie and Ethan turned around to look at Cal

'What the hell is he doing here?!'

'Ohh...erm...right- well Dr Caleb Knight is my brother and we share an apartment.'

Rosie turned back to face Ethan

'You have a brother?!'

'Yup- and that's him' Ethan replied reluctantly.

Rosie seemed even more embarrassed as she looked at the clock,

'Oh no- I'm going to be late! I have to get home and get changed and...and...'

Ethan turned to Cal

'Can you give us a minute?'

Cal sighed before grudging off to the kitchen to make himself breakfast.

'Right- Rosie, nothing's happened- you just fell asleep on my couch and I didn't want you to be woken. You were finally calm. And anyway I'll drop you off at your apartment now, unless you want some breakfast.'

Rosie tried to read his face but failed to spot any signs that he was lying- he was one of the first genuine gentlemen he had ever met.

'No, thanks for the offer though.'

'Anytime!'

Rosie left the front room to grab her coat and shoes, after a short pause Ethan followed her and put on his shoes, when he was about to leave the flat he remembered that he was still wearing his pyjamas so quickly turned around and grabbed his coat.

Ethan dropped Rosie back at her apartment and started the journey back home. It wasn't far to go but it felt like forever- Ethan didn't want to hear Cal's remarks or sarcastic comments, sometimes he wished his brother just didn't exist, that he would disappear and leave him to get on with his life, but Ethan knew that he owed Cal his life and that was pretty hard to argue with.

Ethan snuck into the flat, and then crept up to his room, desperately trying to avoid Caleb. He opened his bedroom door and breathed a sigh of relief, but then he saw Cal sitting on his bed, waiting for Ethan.

'Why was she here?'

'What?!'

'Rosie- you're F2- why was she here?'

'She was upset about something that happened at work yesterday and came here because she needed to talk to someone and I said that she could talk to me. She got here at like 3am- I wasn't going to leave her outside Caleb.'

'Fine, but what would anyone want to talk to you about?'

'Like I said- something that happened at work.'

Ethan was getting increasingly annoyed and time was moving on fast- neither brother was dressed and Ethan still hadn't had any breakfast.

'Well-' Cal began talking again but was cut off by Ethan.

'Get out- now.' Ethan was annoyed and too tired to put up with the annoying antics of his brother.

After a hard look at Ethan Cal walked out. Leaving Ethan to get dressed.

The two brothers didn't talk for the whole day. They took their separate cars and made extra effort to avoid coordinating their breaks. Connie was in a meeting with Guy upstairs but Zoe noticed their strange behaviour,

'Boys- a word please,'

The brothers turned around simultaneously and walked towards Zoe, who was stood in the middle of them, both doctors avoiding eye contact with the other, their F2 mentees watched on and waited for a fight- Rosie knew why the brothers were annoyed but George had no idea of Rosie's late night visit or that the mentors were even related.

'What the hell is going on between you?'

'Nothing'

The boys answered together before glaring at each other and turning away.

'I haven't finished- you have an important job to do and you're also supposed to be mentoring and supporting your F2s. Pull yourselves together and sort out whatever happened between you.'

'Fine.'

'Dr Knight and Dr Jackson you will stay in cubicles but Dr Hardy and Dr March you're with me in resus- incoming RTC with multiple casualties.'

There was silence

'Okay?'

'Fine.'

Caleb was fed up- he hadn't had an interesting case in days, he couldn't take his F2 into resus because Tess and Connie had concerns with his capabilities, he couldn't attend incidents because his F2 was incompetent. Currently Cal hated George.

Meanwhile, in resus, the first of the RTC casualties had arrived- a young boy had been cycling alone when a drunk driver hit him. The mother was hysterical but the young boy was surprisingly calm. After a long look at Rosie Ethan let her take the lead on his case. Zoe was in charge of the drunken driver's case who had passed out inside the car. After hitting the young boy the drunken driver passed out and ran into a large number of parked cars. He was currently unconscious but Zoe was dreading when he came round- some drunks were jolly but others became violent and aggressive.

Ethan was observing Rosie, until he took the hysterical mother to the relative's room and then he left Robyn and Tess to be help in an emergency if Ethan was too far away and Zoe wasn't in the room. Ethan and the young boy's mother sat in the relative's room in silence. Until she said gently,

'You can leave now- I think I'll be okay.'

Ethan offered her a small, reassuring smile

'We'll let you know if something changes.'

And with that he left the relative's room and walked back into resus.

It was all too much, the room started spinning, muffled sounds surrounded him and the lights were too bright, blinding him. Then he was on the floor, unconscious.

Rosie rushed over to Ethan- Zoe's patient had been moved to cubicles but the young boy, called Eric, had crashed. A small needle was placed into his chest to relieve the pressure around his heart- the procedure was carried out by Zoe and observed by Rosie. However for Ethan it brought back painful memories- the crash, Jeff's death, it was the same procedure that Cal had carried out on him. Rosie, Lofty and Max lifted him onto the bed next to them. By the looks of things he had just fainted but the regular tests were all carried out just in case. After a couple of minutes of unconsciousness Ethan came round to be greeted by faces starring into his.

'What happened?'

Ethan attempted to sit up, but regretted it as his already blurred vision worsened and he felt dizzy.

'You just fainted- when was the last time you had something to eat or drink?'

Lofty offered Ethan his glasses so that he could actually see what was going on, after smiling in gratitude he answered his mentee's question

'I had a hot chocolate at about 3 am' the reply was reluctant, and everyone knew why he had fainted- it was 3 in the afternoon. In all the anger of the morning he had skipped breakfast to avoid Caleb and simply hadn't had time to grab any lunch. When he had a break he spent it trying to avoid Caleb and one thing Cal loved was food- so he had steered well clear of the cafe.

'Right- Rosie take Ethan and get some food in him. I'll talk to Connie and see if you can get the afternoon off. I'll see you later mate.' Ethan smiled as Lofty walked off to find Connie.

'Lunch then?' Rosie smiled as she helped Ethan off the bed. The two of them walked to the staffroom via Honey and sat down with two hot drinks, a sandwich and two muffins.

'Eat up.'

Ethan drove home early and went straight to bed- he was shattered and still didn't feel great. Cal walked in later, waking Ethan, but the was quiet enough that Ethan fell asleep again. Caleb walked into Ethan's room and watched him sleep- the last time he had done that was when he was in his hospital room after the crash. Cal wiped the tears from his eyes and went back to his own room where he too fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

For some unexplained reason the next day seemed so happy. All the young doctors were happy, all of them working well together . There were no major incidents, no fatalities and George even made a correct diagnosis. This was too good to be true, but it was true, until it ended. The mood changed when George called a meeting in the staffroom at the end of the shift. Not everyone had met George- but even those who had met him still didn't really know him. He kept himself to himself and refused to socialise.

'Right...' He took a deep breath

'Hello everyone- I'm Dr George Jackson and I'm a F2. Well- I was an F2'

Confused mutters filled the staff room

'I quit.'

The confused mutters rose in volume.

'I never wanted to be a doctor in the first place. I don't like being a doctor. I'm not even a good doctor. So I quit.'

And with that he left the room, left the hospital and left Holby behind.

Rosie walked into her flat. It seemed quiet and empty. She had expected to find George alone in his room but when she pushed open the door she found it was empty. He had really left. Rosie didn't know what to do, she certainly didn't want to stay in her apartment- so she went to the only place that she could think of- to Ethan's apartment.

Rosie stood and waited outside Ethan's door. She knew he was home- she could hear the TV and his car was parked outside. She just couldn't bring herself to open the door. As an all to familiar face approached her she remembered something that she had momentarily forgotten. Caleb lived with Ethan.

'Hey beautiful'

'Not now Caleb'

'There's a really easy way of opening doors you know- by knocking- you should try it sometime.' Cal's voice was soaked in sarcasm

'Yeah- whatever. There's this thing called a Girlfriend- it means you're committed to just one girl.' Rosie had heard all about Cal's player ways from some of the young nurses and she too drowned her voice in sarcasm. Her comment made Cal blush- he had been beaten. He unlocked the door, walked in and yelled

'Ethan- Rosie's here!'

Cal turned back to look at her- she really was beautiful but her words were now spinning round his head, along with Lily's words for a couple of weeks ago. Cal was convinced he could change his ways- earning him Rosie's affection, and prove Lily wrong (that was always a bonus).

Ethan had emerged from the living room and was stood in the doorway watching Cal and Rosie. It was Rosie who first noticed he was there. She looked at him and burst into tears. Next thing she knew she was in Ethan's warm embrace and Cal had left.

'What's wrong?'

'He's gone!' Rosie's response was broken by her sobbing

'Who's gone?'

'G-G-George!' Rosie sobbed even louder.

Ethan was shocked- he hadn't heard George's message but had heard from Robyn what he said. No one had thought he was serious about leaving. He also hadn't realised how close the two F2s were. He knew that they shared a flat but very little else.

'He's left and taken everything with him. And- and I can't afford to rent the apartment by myself!'

Ethan pulled Rosie closer as she sobbed. Then it clicked.

'You can stay here with me!'

'What?' Now it was Rosie who was confused

'There are three bedrooms- I have one, Cal has one and there's one that currently just has some boxes of Cal's old stuff in. We can put Cal's stuff somewhere else and you can live in that room. Free of charge.'

Rosie was shocked by his display of generosity. She knew how kind, caring and reliable he was- everyone at the hospital had told her that- but now she really knew the extent of his kindness.

'Thank you, but I couldn't possibly.'

'Yes you can- and you will. You're like a sister to me- I don't want you to get hurt. It's safe here and I promise it's not a problem.'

'Maybe you should ask your flat mate.' No one had noticed that Cal had reappeared and was watching them.

'No- I don't think I should. This is my home and I can make decisions about it myself.'

'Thank you Ethan- you're the best.' Rosie smiled at Ethan, like a small child who had been given sweets by her big brother.

It took the three doctors nearly four hours to move all Rosie's things into Ethan's apartment. By the time they had finished it was past mid-night. All the doctors were now shattered and had to be in work in the morning. Rosie went to her new room and the brothers went to their rooms.

The three doctors walked into the staffroom the following morning only to be pulled away by Robyn to Connie's office.

'Good morning Dr Knight, Dr March and Dr Hardy.'

'Good morning Mrs Beauchump.' The three young doctors chorused their response.

'As you all know Dr George Jackson, our F2, left us yesterday, rather abruptly. There isn't a new F2 so Ethan you'll continue mentoring Rosie and Caleb you're no longer needed as a mentor.'

Connie's voice was harsh and even Cal was taken aback by her bluntness about him not being needed.

'Right- you can all go now.'

The young doctors left in shocked silence. The rest of the day passed in a blur.


	6. Chapter 6

Every day was passing quicker and quicker- there were few major incidents and the days blurred together. One thing Rosie was very conscious of was life at home. She carefully observed the brothers, the way they spoke to each other and interacted with each other- it was true family love- love mixed with annoyance and occasional outbursts of hatred. Much to her surprise she found herself in this same cycle- she had expected to feel like and outsider but instead found herself feeling like she was their sister and that she'd known the boys for years, not weeks. Rosie had irregular time off to study some more- time which she balanced study with baking. The boys loved to come home to the smell of freshly baked cookies, cake and, occasionally, bread.

Cal didn't stop trying with Rosie but he toned it down, he was aware of the situation he could cause if he acted to greatly to Rosie- it would cause tension both at work and at home, and that wasn't what Cal wanted.

Today was a day that Rosie had off- she spent the morning studying and then went into the kitchen where she started to make some bread, it was tiring work. She had tied her hair into a single plait down her back, but her fringe was creeping out, falling around her face.

She had just placed it in the oven when she heard the door open

'Hi boys!'

Cal walked into the kitchen, alone.

'Where's Ethan?'

'Oh- he had a meeting with Connie- said that he would come home when he'd finished.'

Cal walked over to Rosie, she had a smear of flour on her face

'Rosie you got a little-'

He pulled his hand up to wipe it away, Rosie's hand also reached up. Their eyes met and suddenly fireworks went off in their hearts. Cal pulled up his other hand and clasped her face.

Meanwhile Ethan had finished with Connie and snuck in the door- wanting to surprise the others with his news. He opened the kitchen door and saw Cal and Rosie kissing passionately. The timer beeped but Rosie and Cal didn't move.

'I'll get that then' Ethan's voice was harsh, causing the others to jump and break away from their kiss. Ethan then left the room- leaving the bread in the oven and his flat mates in each others arms.

Ethan left before Rosie and Cal were even up- he still didn't want to talk to either of them. Quite frankly he was shocked- after all Rosie was young, pretty and intelligent and Cal loved women but he sensed that something was different this time. Cal genuinely seemed to like, maybe even love, Rosie. But it was all too strange- his brother and his mentee, both of his flatmates. He felt out of place in his own home. Ethan signed and walked into the ED, he snuck into the staffroom and pulled a book from his locker and sat in the staffroom reading.

'Morning Ethan- you're here early!' Robyn's voice made him jump- he had been so engrossed in his book that he hadn't noticed the nurse come in, he checked his watch

'I could say the same thing about you.'

'Oh- I asked Tess if I could move my shift by an hour- so I'm starting in ten minutes and finishing an hour early.'

'Have fun.'

'I'll see you later Ethan.'

'Bye' Ethan muttered quietly, having turned back to his book, but Robyn had already left.

'Robyn have you seen Rosie and Ethan yet?'

It was rare that Connie spoke to the young nurses casually- she only spoke to them while they were working on patients or if she was looking for someone

'Rosie won't be here for another hour but Ethan is in the staffroom- he's been there for ages.'

When she left the staffroom she saw Charlie and told him that she thought something was wrong with Ethan- he seemed out of it when she spoke to him- and found out from Charlie that Ethan had arrived two hours before Robyn did.

Connie left Robyn alone with her thoughts and walked into the staffroom, somewhere she did not go often, only to find Ethan asleep with a textbook open on his chest. He looked terrible. Connie felt guilty about waking him but she had no choice. She gently shook his knee and said his name.

'Who?! What?!'

'Ethan- it's Connie- we need to have a chat in my office. Preferably now. And get into some scrubs before you come.'

'Mmmmnm okay' Ethan was confused and disorientated with sleep.

Connie left and waited outside the door for Ethan. He took what felt like forever to to get changed and leave the staffroom.

Ethan had got dressed and gained his composure and walked with Connie in the direction of her office.

'What's up with you then?'

'Erm nothing why?'

'No reason'

'Where are Caleb and Rosie?'

As if on cue the two doctors walked in, laughing and holding hands. Ethan ignored them and walked faster to Connie's office. He beat her there but somehow she hadn't noticed Cal and Rosie's arrival.

'Right- I'm sure you know why I asked you here.'

'Not really- no.'

'Well- I spoke to you yesterday and I was expecting a response by today. Have you asked Rosie yet?'

'Erm- no. I was going to ask her when I got home last night but well, something happened and I couldn't.' The words slipped out of his mouth before he had had chance to think about them

'Do you live together? If I find out that any improper conduct has occurred between you two you risk not only ruining your reputation among the staff but also sabotaging your career!' Connie was almost shouting at the young doctor.

'Nothing has happened between us! She lives with Cal and I because she couldn't afford to pay for the flat once George left- George was her flatmate. I had a spare room and she's not only my colleague and mentee but she is also my friend and is more like a sister to me than anyone has ever been!' Ethan was irritated and insulted by Connie's accusation and replied with his voice raised with harsh undertones.

'Okay- I'm sorry but how can you assure me that nothing has or will happen?'

'Well- for starters you should trust me as a doctor and colleague but Cal and Rosie were kissing when I got in last night. That's why I couldn't tell her, that's why I was here early and that's why... that's why...'

Connie looked at the young doctor- he was tired, stressed and fed up with his brothers antics. It wasn't fair what he did to Ethan, and now that Cal had saved Ethan's life and she sensed that there was a sense that Ethan somehow owed Cal something.

Connie's voice and tone had softened

'Go back home and rest. I'll partner up Zoe and Rosie today and if I still don't think you're ready then I'll partner Dylan with Rosie. For once we're sufficiently staffed so you're lucky. You need review some of Rosie's work anyway so you can do that if you get board. I don't want to see you until tomorrow- and if you're more than half an hour early you'll have to come and explain why to me.'

'Thank you Mrs Beauchamp.'

'And Ethan-'

'Yes?'

'Don't forget to tell Rosie what I told you yesterday.'


	7. Chapter 7

Ethan spent the day writing up his work with Rosie, how she interacted with patients, her knowledge, her ability to work with other members of staff as part of a team and her reaction to being with the ambulance. He had no problem with any of it until he got to the end- her reaction to the crash. It had affected her greatly- she had nightmares, was shocked into silence and stillness at the scene, she was deeply shaken and upset. It was a horrific scene for anyone, for any doctor- let alone a F2 on her first call out. Ethan wrote up her reaction- he even included her coming over in the early hours of the morning. Minutes passed as he sat starring at the screen and what he had written. Then he erased it. He simply said that it was a horrific accident that deeply shook her but she managed to help with some small and basic tasks. Ethan printed out the document and signed it, placing it on the table with two train tickets and a note that he had written while eating lunch, on a break from writing up Rosie's work.

It was only 4pm but Ethan was shattered. He went into the bathroom and starred into the mirror, the face that starred back wasn't his own- Connie was right- he looked dreadful and felt it too. He ran a hot shower and let the water relax his muscles. He got into bed and curled up under the duvet. He was asleep minutes later.

Cal and Rosie came home late in the evening- it had been a great day. Now virtually everyone in the department knew about the couple, they didn't have to hide their affections. Connie said that she was fine with it as long was it didn't effect their work. Rosie and Zoe had got on well, although not as well as Rosie and Ethan. The two young doctors walked through the door to the flat, holding hands, they walked into the kitchen where they kissed until Rosie got distracted by something on the table. There was a note, two sets of tran tickets and some paper work. The note was addressed to her, so she quickly opened it and began to read.

_Dear Rosie,_

_Hi and please tell a Cal to stop reading over your shoulder_

Cal sighed and turned his attention to making dinner.

_First of all sorry about this morning and last night. I was just so shocked to find the two of you like that. You're like a sister to me and I don't want to you to get hurt, but I do want you to be happy and so if he makes you happy then go for it! _

_The other thing is that we have been invited to London for a meeting with some other F2s from around the country next week. So pack your bags soon! I am really proud of everything you've done so don't stop doing it. The paperwork is my writer feedback and notes- feel free to read them before I give them to Connie. I'll see you in the morning._

_Ethan_

_xx_

Rosie read through the notes- surprised that it was so positive, maybe she really was a good doctor.

'Can I read it.'

'Erm- no'

'What?! Why not?!' Cal spoke with mock annoyance.

Rather than answer the question she changed the subject

'What's for dinner then?'

Cal looked at her and knew he wouldn't get anything more about it from her.


	8. Chapter 8

The day came for Rosie and Ethan to travel to London. They had to go into work first thing to collect some last minute paper work but they were soon on their way to the train station. Rosie was excited but also nervous- she would soon be with some of the best young doctors in the country! Cal had kissed her goodbye at the door- he wanted to drive her to the train station but Ethan had convinced him to stay at home- Ethan knew about Cal's plan for the romantic dinner for when Rosie returned late in the evening. It wasn't just dinner he had to prepare.

Rosie and Ethan sat side by side on the train- the train had been seriously delayed, and was now overcrowded and noisy. Both young doctors sat reading their books, deeply engrossed in their own private bubble. Then everything seemed to slow down. The lights on the train flickered, there were horrendously loud crashes and bangs, followed by the screaming.

Cal was stood in the jewellers when he got the call

'Hi Cal- it's Zoe. There's been a major incident and a large number of casualties are being taken to us. I know that you booked today off but we really need you in work- we can't get hold of Ethan or Rosie and they're probably nearer to London than here by now. Can you get here as soon as possible?'

'Yeah- sure, just give me 10 minutes. I'm kinda in the middle of something important.'

'Thanks Cal.' Then the line went dead.

Cal has already chosen what he wanted, so quickly paid for it and rushed into work. He placed the small box in his locker and joined Zoe in resus.

'Wow- you got here quick. Where were you?'

'Oh- I was only round the corner.'

'What did you have to do?'

'It... it's kind of personal, sorry Zoe.'

'Okay' said Zoe with a knowing smile

'I'll tell you soon. I'll tell everyone.'

Zoe smiled at the young doctor- he really had changed and she was thrilled to see him so happy.

'Oh and Zoe-'

'Yes'

'What is the major incident?'

'It was a train crash- just outside Holby.'


	9. Chapter 9

Rosie found herself trapped inside something- it was strong and seemed to be wrapped around her, crushing her, but it was also warm and protective. She smelt him but she also smelt the burning and felt the hot sticky liquid that was seeping onto her. Then it went black.


	10. Chapter 10

Dixie and Ian were among the 20 ambulances that arrived at the crash site. There were 4 carriages, so 5 ambulance teams were designated to each carriage. Police and fire crews were on the scene- making it safe for the ambulances teams to work, removing and identifying bodies and trying to figure out the cause of such a devastating crash.

Dixie and Ian walked into their carriage along with 8 other paramedics from a number of different regions. They called out but had very few responses- this was the final carriage of the train- it wasn't particularly full but it had broken away from the other carriages and rolled several times during the crash. It was a horrific scene. There was a lot of blood, which covered all the walls. They found two young children crying at the back of the carriage, next to their dead mother. Miraculously both of the children seemed relatively unharmed- the mother must have somehow managed to protect them. They were taken to St James' as they were lower priorities. Higher priority cases were being taken to the Holby ED because it was closer. The death toll continued to rise as they assessed patients, most of whom had broken necks from not being retained during the rolling of the carriage. Occasionally they would find a live patient- but they were in a very bad way with multiple, often open, fractures. There was virtually no one conscious in the carriage.  
>Dixie continued checking patients in the carriage, she tripped on a textbook on the floor, but Ian caught her. Dixie opened the textbook and, inside on the front page, a name was written in neat pen: Ethan Hardy. Dixie felt sick- somewhere in this carriage Ethan, and probably Rosie, were. She had to find them. Confusion and distress filled her mind- why were they even on this train? They should have arrived in London by now- everyone in the ED knew where Ethan and Rosie were. Everyone loved the two young doctors- they were, not only amazingly talented but also kind and funny. Dixie continued to search frantically for her colleagues, while Ian called the ED on the radio.<br>'Hello Holby ED.' It was Charlie that answered the phone  
>'Charlie- it's Ian, we're at the train crash site in the fourth carriage. The carriage with the most fatalities.'<br>'Yes? Go on'  
>'We think that this was Rosie and Ethan's carriage.'<br>The line went quiet  
>'Why?' Charlie sounded upset and concerned<br>'We have found Ethan's textbook but we haven't found him or Rosie yet.'  
>'Right- I'll tell Cal. We had to call him in today because of the crash anyway. Let me know if anything changes.'<br>'We will'  
>Ian cut off the call to continue treating patients.<p>

Charlie called Cal out of resus, for now he wasn't needed. They were all waiting for the next wave of patients to flood through the doors.  
>'Cal- we have had some information from the ambulance crew.' Charlie looked at Cal's face which was becoming increasingly stressed and tense<br>'What is it Charlie.' Cal said, trying to smile  
>'We think that Ethan and Rosie were on the train.' Cal began to sob loudly 'I'm so, so sorry.'<br>Tears were falling thick and fast down the young doctors face.  
>'This can't happen- not today.' Cal's voice was broken and he struggled to speak through the sobs that shook his body violently. Charlie held Cal, or tried to, their difference in height was awkward but Cal seemed to appreciate the gesture. Zoe walked out of resus to see where Cal had gone, expecting him to have gone for a coffee, and was shocked to see him sobbing on Charlie's shoulder.<br>'Zoe can you please inform the staff that Dr Hardy and Dr March were on the train. We don't know what kind of state they're in, but it sounds bad.' Zoe was also shocked by the news, and now understood why Cal was in such a state- his brother and his girlfriend in a serious train crash with a high fatality rate. Zoe left Cal and Charlie but didn't tell the other staff- not yet. She needed them on their top of their game to treat all the other casualties from the crash.

They were in a corner, soaked in blood. Ethan's body was wrapped tightly around another body, protecting it from harm. It was traumatising to see them like that. Ethan had multiple open fractures to nearly all his limbs, he had a severe head wound, his neck was twisted at an unnatural angle and he wasn't moving. Dixie knew that the chance of him surviving such horrific injuries was slim, but she couldn't give up hope. She checked him for a pulse, but when she touched his cold, clammy skin she knew he was long gone. Dixie couldn't just leave him for the police to remove. He was a friend. Dixie peeled Ethan's bloody, lifeless body off the body underneath him- it was Rosie. She was in a much better state, despite her open fractures to her left leg and various lacerations across her body, she seemed okay. She wasn't conscious and looked like she had some trauma to her head. Ian wasn't with her and hadn't seen the tears in her eyes or Ethan's body.  
>'Ian- here now! It's ours!'<br>Ian rushed over and saw Ethan's body and Rosie's body. Ethan was clearly dead, but Rosie was still alive. He didn't know how much longer for. She wasn't conscious and could have a large number of internal injuries. In silence they loaded her onto a spinal board and prepared themselves to take her back to Holby ED. Ian called over to one of the other ambulance crews.  
>'We have a fatality over here. I know it's a bit strange but can you take him to the morgue at Holby Hospital. He's one of our doctors. Well- he was. He has a brother there and it would be better for all of us if we could have his body at the hospital instead of here for the police to deal with.'<br>'Yeah- sure. Sorry.'  
>The other ambulance crew got to work securing Ethan's body in a spinal board and body bag to take to the hospital morgue. The ambulance sped through the streets towards the ED, the ambulance with Ethan's body in followed at a much slower speed. While on route Ian called the ED to update Charlie.<br>'Charlie- it's Ian we found them.'  
>'Right- what state are they in?'<br>'Ethan had wrapped himself around Rosie and I think that protected her from fatal injuries but she has a number of open fractures on her left leg, a large number of lacerations and what looks like minor trauma to her head. Eta 2 minutes.'  
>'And Ethan?'<br>The silence on Ian's end told Charlie everything. Ethan was gone.  
>'Where is he now?'<br>'In a second ambulance behind us- the police agreed to let us take him back to the hospital morgue. I'm sorry. We couldn't do anything.'  
>The line went dead.<p>

Charlie looked at Zoe and shook his head. Tears filled her eyes. She still hadn't told the rest of the staff that they were even on the train. Cal wasn't anywhere to be found. He had hidden in the staffroom. While Charlie tried to find Cal, Zoe called the staff to meet around the nurses station.  
>'I have an announcement to make. About an hour ago we received information that the train that crashed had items belonging to two of our young doctors- Dr Ethan Hardy and Dr Rosie March. Since then we have had an update that Rosie is on her way in but-' Zoe choked on the lump in her throat. 'But Ethan didn't make it. He protected Rosie as the train crashed. It's thanks to him that we even have one of our doctors coming back tonight.'<br>Shocked gasps and sobs filled the air. No one said anything- no one wanted to and no one could.  
>'Where is he?' A small voice spoke, it turned out to be Robyn who had tears silently pouring down her face.<br>'He's on his way to our morgue in a separate ambulance. Ian and Dixie requested that he came here instead of stay at the scene.'  
>The staff were silent, there was not a dry eye in the room and no one moved.<br>'Rosie will be here any minute. I'm so, so sorry, but we do still have a department to run.'  
>The staff slowly dispersed and waited in resus for Rosie.<p> 


	11. Chapter 11

It took a good 5 minutes for Charlie to find Cal. Cal was slumped in a corner of the staff room quietly sobbing. Charlie sat down on the floor next to him, it took a lot of effort for the old nurse to sit on the floor. Cal turned to look Charlie in the eye.

'What's the news?' Cal's voice was hoarse

'They found them. Rosie's on her way in. She has multiple open fractures to one of her legs, multiple lacerations, what looks like a blunt head trauma and she's unconscious but she seems to be alright.' Cal nodded- at least Rosie seemed to be okay.

'And Ethan?'

Charlie couldn't look Cal in the eye, a shook his head gently.

'I'm so sorry.'

Cal yet again burst into tears. His little brother, his smart, charming baby brother. He was gone.

'Where is he now?'

'He's on his way to the hospital morgue. Our paramedics didn't want him to stay at the crash site- he's their friend and colleague. They wouldn't abandon him.'

Cal managed to control his emotions, to ask a question.

'What happened?'

Charlie misinterpreted the question.

'I don't know- you'd have to ask the police but I don't think they know.'

'I meant what happened to Ethan. What- What-'

Charlie knew what Cal was asking- he wanted to know why Ethan died.

'He was found wrapped around Rosie. It was like he was trying to protect her, and it sounds like he did a pretty good job. He had open fractures to most of his limbs, his neck was broken and he also had deep lacerations across his body. He was in the carriage with the highest fatality rate. He managed to save Rosie from what killed him. He's a hero.'

Cal nodded, he still couldn't believe that his brother was gone.

The two men left the staffroom to find out if Rosie had arrived yet. She had and was inside resus being treated by Zoe, Robyn and Lofty. Cal arrived at the door as Zoe was putting a small needle into Rosie's chest- just like he had done for Ethan months before. Charlie guided Cal to the relative's room- it was empty. All the family who needed to know about crash victims had been sent to some meeting rooms upstairs. They were the only ones in the room so their silence echoed on the four walls. Minutes turned to hours as Cal and Charlie sat in nervous anticipation, waiting for news on Rosie's case. After what felt like a lifetime Zoe arrived at the door.

'We're just moving her to a side room- she's stable.' Zoe gave Cal a sad smile. 'Dr Hardy is in the morgue.' And with that Zoe left.

Dr Hardy- Cal had never thought of him as Dr Hardy- he was always Ethan. It was as though calling him Dr Hardy made it all less personal, less painful.

Cal stood up and left the room, leaving Charlie in the silence. Cal rushed down to the morgue, not knowing what to expect. He knew he was going to see his dead brother but it didn't feel like he was. It felt like something else, like he was just going to see his brother, it was irrelevant that he was dead.

When Cal saw Ethan it suddenly became real. Ethan's eyes were closed, his lips slightly apart, his clothes torn and bloody. His body was a mess. Open fractures, cuts, bruises, but the worst injury, by far was the abnormal twist in his neck. It was swollen, and tinted a light shade of blue, contrasting with his olive skin and red painted clothes. Cal knew that Ethan's neck was broken- Charlie told him that, he had also seen dead patients with broken necks, still seeing his brother like that was just horrible.

'I'm so sorry Ethan. I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry for being a jerk, I'm sorry for causing trouble, I'm sorry of giving you grief about Rosie, I'm sorry that I can't save you. I love you. I love you, so much. And thank you- you saved Rosie's life. I never hated you, despite everything I said. I have always thought that you're an amazing doctor. An amazing brother. An amazing friend. An amazing person. You put everyone else first. I won't forget you. I can't- no one else will be able to either. You made such a difference to so many people's lives. Goodbye Ethan. I'll never stop loving you.'

Cal's tears dripped onto Ethan's body, some landing in his messy hair, some on his face and neck. Cal left the morgue without a backwards glance. He was unaware that Charlie had slipped in after him and was watching him, incase something happened to him.

Cal ran to the staffroom, avoiding the other members of staff. He wiped his eyes and washed his hands to get rid of the sticky red liquid that belonged to Ethan. He went to his locker and pulled out the small box. He took a deep breath and walked out of the staffroom and to Rosie's side room. She was hooked up to a variety of machines and an oxygen mask rested on her face. Her long hair was sprawled out on the pillow, her eyes were closed, her limbs limp by her sides.

Cal opened the small box and got down on one knee.

'Rosie- I don't know if you can hear me, I really hope you can, else I'm just talking to myself, again. I love you. I have never truly loved anyone, but you probably already knew that. I can't see myself with anyone else. You arrived here, that first day and everything changed. I just knew that you were the one for me. At first you kinda hated me- I was annoying and stuff but when we kissed that first time there were fireworks, there was passion and there was love. I've never loved someone as much as I love you an I probably never will again. I can't lose you. I've already lost someone I love, I can't loose another. Rosie please wake up.' Tears were streaming down his face 'And Dr Rosie Jemma March- will you marry me?'

There was no response but Cal wasn't expecting one. He slipped the ring on her finger and kissed her on the forehead.

'I love you.'


	12. Chapter 12

Charlie had stopped stalking Cal when he walked into Rosie's side room- he wasn't trying to invade his privacy but, having just lost his brother, he didn't want Cal to do something stupid.

Cal sat in the staffroom. He must have drifted off because next thing he knew he was covered in a blanket on the sofa and Robyn was sat next to him.

'Hey,' he was offered a sad smile. 'You should be in Rosie's room, not the staffroom. She'll want you to be there when she comes round.'

Cal allowed himself to be guided to Rosie's room. He no longer had any idea what time it was or even what day it was

'Have you seen her yet?'

'Yeah I went in earlier. After I saw Ethan.' Then there was silence.

The two of them walked into the room. Robyn walked up to Rosie's bed side but Cal remained at the door. Something on Rosie's hand was glittering, catching the light from the window. Robyn moved round the bed to get a closer look. On her hand was a silver ring, an engagement ring. A smile crept onto her lips

'Did you!?'

'Yeah, I proposed. I was going to do it when she got home from the meeting. I had a romantic dinner planned out and everything. But then you know- everything happened.' Cal's voice was soft, tears rolled down his face as he looked at her. She was so peaceful and so very beautiful.

The young nurse left him with his girlfriend. Robyn walked over to Lofty who she hugged while bursting into tears. Lofty let Robyn's tears spill all over him

'I want to see him.' Robyn knew what she wanted, 'I want to see him- it's the only way it'll seem true.'

Lofty and Robyn stood at Ethan's side in the morgue. He had been cleaned up since Cal saw him. He was no longer painted red by his own blood. His open fractures were stitched shut so that he would be presentable for the funeral. His blond hair was covering his eyes. Robyn knew how much he hated that, so she leant forward and pushed back his fringe. He looked much younger now- he wasn't wearing his glasses, they had been put with his other belongings that were found at the crash site. The nurses sobbed for the friend and colleague. They weren't the first- several members of staff had come down to see him since the crash and said their goodbyes- everyone cried and returned to the ED feeling numb. It wasn't right for someone to die so young, with so much left to do.

The nurses walked back up to the ED, and sat silently in the staffroom. Nothing felt right anymore. It was heartbreaking to see Cal sit by Rosie's bed and cry his way through the day. Cal hadn't gone back to the apartment since he left to buy the ring. Ethan was always over prepared for everything. Cal knew that inside the notebook in his top draw there were elaborate plans for his funeral. Who he wanted inviting, what he wanted people to wear, where he wanted to be buried and what flowers he wanted. It was scary how organised it was. Cal knew where it was and knew that he should get it, so he could start planning the funeral.

Cal walked home- his car was at the hospital but he didn't want to drive. He wanted to walk and not have to think. He didn't try to hide the tears that fell down his face- everyone had seen him cry- he had a right to be upset and he no longer cared if people thought he was soft. Connie had given him compassionate leave for 2 months, but he was still in the hospital everyday, at Rosie's beside. Waiting. Always waiting and watching.

Cal stood and starred at the door to the apartment. The door that he had stumbled through after a rough night of partying, the door that he slammed when he had a row with Ethan, the door that he kissed Rosie as they came in from work, the door that held together so many memories- both happy and sad. He pushed open the door and ran upstairs to Ethan's bedroom- he wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. Ethan's room was unchanged- which, for some reason surprised Cal, as if because Ethan was dead his room would change for some reason. Cal rummaged around in the draw until he found the slim black note book. He grabbed it and turned to leave the room when something stopped him. There was something else he needed. It took some more rummaging but Cal found it- the photo memory book from when they were younger. He didn't dare to open it but clutched it close to his chest like it was his brother rather than an old, tattered book.

Next Cal went into his room, grabbed a rucksack and some clean clothes. Finally he went into Rosie's room. It had taken a while to get round to but it had been painted deep purple and matched the pale purple flourishes across the room. He carefully picked up two of the vases, now filled with dead flowers, and a fluffy cushion from the foot of her bed. Having placed them all in his bag Cal left the flat and started on the road to the hospital. He walked slowly so it took some time but he didn't mind. His mind was too full of emotions to care about time. He passed a flower shop on his way to the ED and bought two bouquets of flowers for Rosie's hospital room. The flowers were pink with purple accents, they were beautiful.

Having arrived back at the ED Cal arranged the flowers and placed the cushion at the foot of the bed. He curled up into a ball on the chair next to Rosie's bed and drifted of to sleep- reading the books he had brought from home could wait. The nurses regularly checked on Cal and Rosie, when they found Cal asleep in the chair beside Rosie they covered him with a blanket and dimmed the lights, in the hope that it would help him sleep. It never did.


	13. Chapter 13

Yet again Cal woke with a start after another sleepless night. He sat and watched Rosie breathe. Her chest gently rose and fell as she lay on the bed. No one knew exactly why she was still unconscious, it was likely the stress and trauma of the crash put her into a coma to recover. Cal both dreamed and dreaded that she would wake up- he wanted to see her smile, hear her voice, taste her lips as they kissed, but at the same time he knew he would have to tell her that Ethan was gone. Everyone knew how close the three young doctors were and they knew how hard it would be to get over it- if they managed to get over it at all.

The time had come to look through Ethan's funeral- he wasn't expecting what he found. A guest list had been regularly updated so Cal quickly scanned through it, checking if there was anyone who was invited that didn't know that he was dead- there wasn't. Everyone who was invited worked at the hospital or in the ambulance service. At least he wouldn't have to tell anyone else. Cal put more effort into reading the crossed out names, predictable names had been crossed out 'Mum' 'Jeff', the friends that had died, friends from university that he hadn't spoken to for years 'Harry' 'Jess' and then he noticed one name that was crossed out but reappeared several times on the list- 'Caleb'. Cal choked back tears- why couldn't he have been a better brother? Would it have been so hard?

A small, weak cough caught Cal's attention- it wasn't coming from the direction of the door, so it wasn't another member of staff. Cal turned to look at Rosie, her chocolate eyes had flickered open and she was startled by what surrounded her. Last thing she remembered she was trapped, drowning in smells of burning, in the screams, in the hot sticky blood. She began to hyperventilate- this was not good- she needed to calm down or risk further damage to her body. Cal tried to calm her down in the traditional way, speaking gently and encouraging them to focus on their breathing. It didn't work and Rosie was clearly becoming worn out. Cal did the only other thing he could thing of- he leant over and kissed her. As if by magic Rosie calmed down, her breathing steadied and she managed wake up slightly.

'Good morning beautiful,' Cal spoke softly, not to startle her. He allowed her to continue analysing the room. Cal had refused to put up the get well cards and the sympathy cards. They were in a box in the staffroom. He wanted to appreciate Rosie's recovery without Ethan's death hanging over him. He knew it would anyway but he wanted to keep the sympathy cards for another time. Rosie could open her own get well cards.

'Caleb,'

'I'm here- it's alright.' Cal knew what was coming next

'Ethan?' Her voice was small and hoarse

Cal couldn't say it, not again. He just shook his head. Rosie let out a shocked gasp, her hand flew to her mouth and tears ran down her face. Rosie turned over the hand that had flown to her mouth- siting on her ring finger was a silver ring with a small diamond, she gasped again, and fresh tears spilt down her face.

'Right I'll try again,' he got down on one knee and looked into her eyes, 'Dr Rosie Jemma March, will you marry me?'

'Yes! Yes Caleb!' For now the pain of Ethan's death was replaced with hope and excitement for a wedding.

'Rosie I was so scared- I don't know what I'd do without you. I truly do love you- more than I've loved anyone else. You- you're my everything. Especially now. And I can't lose someone else.'

'I love you too Caleb.'

The two young and now engaged doctors kissed, just as Robyn walked in. She let out an excited squeal- she hadn't been allowed to tell anyone else about the ring, Zoe had regularly checked up on Rosie while Cal was sleeping and had seen the ring but didn't comment- he would tell everyone when he was ready. Robyn scuttled out of the side room and gathered as many members of staff as possible. The staff filed into Rosie's room where Robyn quickly said

'Rosie and Caleb have an announcement!' She could barely contain her excitement.

The couple looked at each other, smile and announced

'We're engaged!' They sealed their message with a kiss. Cheers broke out among the staff. Finally something to celebrate. The staff left them in peace in their room.

Zoe turned to Robyn,

'That was what he was doing the morning of the crash- he was going to buy the ring wasn't he? That's why he was only round the corner.'

'Yeah- he had a romantic dinner planned and then- then-' Robyn choked on her words and burst into tears, Zoe wrapped her arm around the young nurse and let the tears trickle down her face too.


	14. Chapter 14

'Rosie- we think that you are ready to be discharged today.'

Rosie and Cal were desperate for Rosie to be discharged but didn't particularly want to go back to the flat. They were getting through the loss of Ethan together- that made it easier.

Rosie's leg was slowly recovering- it now hand six pins holding various bones in her leg and foot together. She had grown used to pulling her weight on crutches and wheeling herself around in the chair when when she tired. Cal was always gentlemanly- pushing her around the department and occasional day trips around the town- giving both of them a break a break from the little hospital side room. The original plan was to have moved Rosie up onto the wards but the only free room was the same one that Ethan had stayed in after the minibus crash- it was unbelievable bad luck. Zoe and Charlie made the decision to just keep her in one of the side rooms- after all Cal would be useful if any major incidents came in- even though he was still on compassionate leave.

Cal began to gather up all of Rosie's belonging- odd items of clothing, tonnes of cards and a variety of gifts, a mixture of sympathy, get well soon and congratulations on your engagement. The room was a mix of emotions- it was surreal and just felt wrong.

'An appointment has been made for you to check how you're healing and you can get it of Noel or Louise at reception. Right- I'll be back in a bit, see you soon. Take care guys- you know where we are if you need us.' Zoe left the room with yet another sad smile.

Cal wheeled Rosie out of her room and towards his car, he was followed by Lofty who had offered to carry their stuff.

'See you later mate.' Lofty hugged Cal before hurrying back to the ED.

Cal helped Rosie into the passenger's seat and packed up the wheelchair into the boot with their other belongings from the hospital room. The journey home was quiet- to break the deafening silence Rosie turned on the radio. It was a bad decision- the one song that they didn't want to hear began to play 'If I die young'. It echoed through the car, despite the fact that Cal immediately turned the radio off the song still ran through their heads. Silent tears tumbled down Rosie's face and Cal used all his strength to stop his doing the same thing.

Seconds passed- the couple continued staring at the front door. Minutes passed- they starred frozen to the spot, watching it. As they looked at the door they were both reminded of their sarcastic battle when Rosie had to be told exactly how to use a door. They both smiled at the memory until they remembered who was waiting on the other side of the door- he wasn't there now. The house was empty apart from their lifeless possessions. Everything inanimate was no longer inanimate but now lifeless- as if the life had been maliciously stolen from them- like Ethan's had been.

When they finally pushed open the door they felt a wage of relief wash over them- they were home at last. Cal was finally beginning to accept that he should be focusing that Rosie had been saved by Ethan and that he could now marry the love of his life. That night, for the first time in a long time, Cal slept soundly. There was no pain or suffering, no death or destruction, just a young Caleb and Ethan playing together as he relived his happy memories.


	15. Chapter 15

Rosie and Cal knew that there was little time to plan their wedding- they had to quickly plan Ethan's funeral first. It was now over a month since he had died- thankfully Ethan's organised planning made it easy to sort. Guests were invited, flowers were booked and a church service was planned. It was to be in a week's time. That would be the final goodbye to a man that everyone loved.

One of the main points on Ethan's list was that he didn't want anyone to wear black. He wanted everyone in brighter colours- he wanted to be remembered for his life not his death. 'Obviously when he wrote this he didn't think he would die a hero' Cal thought.

It was just four days before the funeral when the world crashed yet again. Rosie and Caleb went to the local shopping centre to buy their outfits for the funeral- according to Rosie Cal's entire wardrobe was to dark and dreary- all shades of blacks and greys. Rosie's wardrobe was half useless now- because of the large cast and crutches she was very restricted in what she could wear- she was hoping that she wouldn't have to wear her pink jogging bottoms to the funeral, she wanted to look smart.

Rosie picked out a blue suit for Cal- navy jacket and trousers, a lighter shirt and a royal blue tie. Reluctantly Cal tried on the suit- he stood and smiled at himself in the mirror- the blues actually kind of suited him. Then it went wrong.

'You're a doctor at Holby ED- aren't you?'

Cal was taken back by the woman's question- she had appeared out of no where.

'Erm yes.'

'Why were you smiling?'

'Because I-' he was cut off

'You were there the day of the train crash- weren't you?'

Caleb ignored the question.

'You were there- weren't you!'

'Fine- yes I was there.' Cal was frustrated and annoyed by the woman's strange questions.

'You did nothing!' She spat at Cal 'You're supposed to be a doctor and yet you did nothing!'

'Excuse me what?'

'You don't even remember her! You're insensitive and useless! You don't care- none of the doctors care!'

Tears gathered in Cal's eyes

'You probably don't even care how many people died on that train!' The woman was now shouting at Cal.

'Yes I do- 239 people died.'

'So they're just numbers to you are they?'

'No- and do you know why not?! My brother was one of them. My fiancé was nearly one of them.'

The woman was silent.

'So don't say that the staff are useless at the ED. My colleagues are incredibly talented but the crash was horrific. Most people died instantly at the scene.' Cal's voice was also raised- he had hot, angry tears streaming down is face. He turned on his heel back to the changing rooms where he got out of the suit, regained his composers and joined Rosie.

'What was all that about?'

'What was what all about?'

'Cal- you're eyes are still red and I heard the two of you arguing.'

'A woman accused me of not caring- she accused everyone else at the ED of not caring. It's just not true. We lost Ethan on that train and we nearly lost you. I nearly lost you.'

Cal buried his head in Rosie's shoulder and her soft hair. Rosie hugged him and rubbed his back until his sobs calmed. She kissed his cheek as he pulled away from the hug. Rosie had already chosen her dress, and so they went straight to the check out to buy Cal's suit. The journey home was quiet. Most journeys were now- neither doctor wanted to turn on the radio following the unfortunate incident last time.


	16. Chapter 16

The day of the funeral was finally here. The ED was quiet with only a few staff members bustling around- most of whom had been transferred from AAU and Keller. Connie had persuaded Guy to allow them to have today off to go to the funeral- any members of staff who were working were likely to be upset and it would generally be better to just not have them in at all. Ethan's body was already at the church- it was quiet a while away from the ED and where Rosie and Cal lived but if was what he had asked for. Everyone made their way to the funeral separately, and, as requested, were wearing brighter colours.

Rosie and Cal were driving down the frosty roads listening to a CD that they found in Ethan's room. It was all of his favourite songs from when he was little- although it was sad it was better than the deafening silence and definitely better than the unpredictable nature of the radio. The sat nav guided them along the roads- they were going to be early. Cal did that a lot now- he was always early to everything and had not once been late. He had begun to adopt some of Ethan's personality traits- the nervousness, the earliness, the honesty, the genuine nature.

They cruises down the road and through the country lanes, it suddenly opened out into large fields that were white with frost and snow, there were small ponds and rivers that fed into a larger lake, all of which was frozen. It was all so peaceful


	17. Chapter 17

There was a sharp turn up ahead, Cal gently turned the steering wheel to guide them around the corner. They hit a lump of ice which sent them spinning off the road and onto the lake, hitting a nearby tree. The impact was so great it knocked both of the young doctors unconscious, beneath them the ice began to creak, small cracks appeared in the surface. The old tree they had hit was dressed in snow- a lot of it had been knocked off in the impact but it was still beautiful. The tree groaned loudly before crashing down onto the car, trapping both Cal and Rosie. The increase in weight was too much- the ice shattered beneath them, causing the car to plunge into the icy depths below, pulling it's doomed inhabitants down with it.

Cal and Rosie stood on the bank, holding hands and watching their car, belongings and bodies sink further into the water.


	18. Chapter 18

Dr Caleb Knight, Dr Rosie March and Dr Ethan Hardy. All dead within the month.

Ethan's notebook was in Cal's car and was lost to the lake. Cal's and Rosie's bodies were recovered later that day- they were long gone. Their skin was a pale blue, their eyes lifeless, their bodies stiff. Ethan's funeral was postponed further, and the department said goodbye to all their young doctors at once. To say that the funeral was sad would be an incredible understatement. They were shocked, appalled, horrified and heartbroken. Loud sobs followed the coffins from the church to the graveyard. Ethan wanted to be buried next to his mother, so Ethan lay between his mother and his brother. Rosie lay next to Caleb so that the young couple could be together. Staff tried to contact Rosie's family but had no luck- it looked like Ethan and Cal were all the family she had. Unlike some gravestones, the young doctors always had fresh flowers, their graves were well kept and the staff at the hospital regularly visited them. Every time they went they hoped that it wasn't true- that somehow Ethan survived the train crash, that somehow Rosie and Cal survived their car crash into the lake. Every time they were disappointed. Every time they were left with the brutality that was death, the evil, malicious nature of a devil who snatched life from the young.

**Thanks for all your support! And wishing you, your family and friends a Merry Christmas, a happy new year and a restful holiday.**


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